Studying abroad gives a student a wealth of incredible experiences – learning about different cultures, developing new friendships, and vomiting vodka Red Bull in a completely different time zone. It is just over 10 years since I, a young British lad who had never even been on an aircraft, took flight for a year at the University of Colorado in America. It proved to be one of the most memorable years of my life.

Having recently published a novel, (A Foreign Education, Exposure Publishing), loosely based on my time in Colorado but with considerably more sex, my mind has been ruminating over the difference between my University experiences on both sides of the Atlantic. While there are many comparisons that can be made, some more subtle than others, the main ones revolve around studying and drinking.

So what can I tell you about American students and how their studying habits compare with the British? Well the first clear difference is that most Americans are pant-wettingly keen to impress their professors. Whereas the lecture theatres at any self-respecting British university are brimming with dazed students recovering gingerly from hangovers and simply copying down notes like stoned zombies, American students are dripping with enthusiasm and interaction. They constantly ask questions, point out flaws in the teacher’s arguments, and generally brown-nose like their lives depended on it.

The American thirst for knowledge is only exceeded by a British student’s thirst for cheap lager, but this incredible motivation is not purely born out of academic interest. Cut-throat competition is rife in American classrooms, as the top grades are only available for the top few students. This contrasts with the English system whereby every student could theoretically be awarded the top grade if they all performed well enough. So while British students will happily collaborate on homework and study together for exams, an American is more likely to lend you his mother’s well-worn silk panties than his class notes.

Who is the smartest, then, in this transatlantic battle of brains? There is no doubting that the British study smarter – working together outside of the classroom allows a pooling of knowledge that is hard to beat – but the Americans have the edge when it comes to raw motivation and participation in a subject. This inevitably leads to a greater overall understanding, albeit without making many friends along the way.

Now let’s put the studying aside and concentrate on the social aspects of University life. Your average student is aged 18 – 21, with the legal age for alcohol consumption being 18 in Britain and 21 in America. British students are generally very comfortable with alcohol by the time they attend University, and already know the pleasures of a sociable pint or two with friends in the evening. The story is a little different on the other side of the pond, where you often need good connections or cast-iron fake identification to buy even a 3% strength bottle of beer.

Restricted access to the loopy juice naturally leads to rather excessive drinking when the opportunity does finally present itself. While the British have a casual pint here and there, the Americans will not stop until they are slumped in a gutter, helplessly gushing from both ends. Of course we all drink to excess from time to time, but the difference is that underage students in America rarely seem to drink in moderation at all. Drinking is very much an all or nothing activity.

The goals of drinking are also very different. In Britain the male students drink to give themselves the courage to pull female students, while the female students drink so that they are slightly less repulsed by the advances of the slobbering drunken male students. American students simply drink because they can. Even the threat of a night in a jail cell doesn’t deter their quest for incontinence-inducing inebriation.

So who parties the hardest between these two nations of University students? It is unquestionably the Americans, but only by virtue of the fact that British students have their wildest partying years behind them by the time they arrive at University. The most intelligent drinking students are therefore the British, who have wisely evolved their habits to realise benefits of the sexual variety.

Whether you are British or American, and whether you study smart or party hard, I can highly recommend the whole study abroad experience. The hangovers may only linger for a few hours, and the knowledge gained from your classes may only be remembered for a few months, but everything else will remain with you for the rest of your life.